People do business to the level of their relationship. The greater the relationship (and trust), the greater the possibility of bigger and better business. So an important part of growing business is learning how to start to build solid business relationships quickly.

A key aspect of starting and building a relationship with someone is the level of trust and respect that each participant holds the other in. There are many ways to grow a level of trust and today I want to discuss some techniques that are coming out of the top persuasion research labs (There are numerous university teams studying specifically how to persuade people.)

Rapport is the term for gaining trust and respect quickly. When researchers studied some of the characteristics of sets of top gun sales people, they noticed the fact that top performers can build rapport with clients quickly and consistently.

What happened is that the components of rapport were identified. Even further, the studies are showing that these components are consistently applied by top producers who have great relationships with their customers. When these components are applied inconsistently, the level of business relationship varies widely.

Research has also shown that the common elements of rapport are in place whenever any of us interact with people we like and know well. In other words, there are certain actions you can take that will foster rapport and trust, even when you've just met someone for the first time.

What about your business? If you have a team of sales people, an excellent way to start getting them aware of this is to discuss what works best and then create their own rapport guide. Have a meeting where you seed the conversation with the importance of rapport and then get your team talking about what works best for them. Record the best practices and then use that as a company guide about how to establish relationships.

The basics of rapport rest on becoming as similar to the other person as possible. We all tend to like people who are just like us! The more unaware (or unconscious) they are of what you are mirroring, the more powerful and rapid the rapport you gain.

The basics of this would involve things like having similar interests or likes and dislikes, really knowing the clients business, and getting details about their personal life. It can be further accelerated by having a similar body position and talking at the same rate, pitch and tonality.

Here's something that I practice to create rapport. Facial expressions. This is a really big thing to be able to mirror. Whatever it is they're doing facially, you're going to do it as well.

People are not very aware of their facial expressions. So that is something that I've found very useful to mirror. Another powerful thing to mirror is rate of breathing. This is one of the most powerful things to pace and it's simple to do, especially when you are talking to someone.

The small complication is that while you are talking you have to get the rhythm of all this down. You're talking and I'm paying attention to what you're saying; then I'm replying, and now I'm going to try to pace your breathing too. That's quite a bit to pay attention too.

You have to get comfortable with this and with some practice and experience - you can! Here's a little trick for you. When I'm talking am I breathing in or out? Clearly, when I'm talking, I'm breathing out!

A good practice task is to mirror another persons speech by raising a hand or finger when they are talking and lowering when they are breathing in. So find someone and as they talk, follow along with your hands - you can use the TV or radio for this as well. Just practice this - you will discover that when someone stops talking, mostly they are getting a breath.

Remember, these are the actions that we all do unconsciously when we are around people we like. By consciously practicing these actions with customers and clients, we are accelerating the relationship and ultimately providing better service. That's a basic to grow your business.

For the details on the mechanics of persuasion, I would refer you to some of the leading proponents:

Kenrick Cleveland

Eric Knowles PHD